Nicole Kidman is learning to live without a script — and, for once, she has no idea what the next scene looks like.
Speaking to British Vogue, the 59-year-old Oscar winner opened up about life following her divorce from Keith Urban, admitting that the past year forced her to rethink what she thought her future would look like.
“My desire is not to be ruled by my head,” Kidman said, explaining her new “feelings first” approach to life and work.
“But at the same time I’m like, ‘OK, I didn’t expect this. I had a different view of what my life was going to be, but this is what it is now,’” she continued.
“You make all these plans and you have all these ideas of what it’s all going to be like and then it’s … not. You have to adjust. You adapt. The future, it’s completely unknown to me right now.”
Kidman and Urban, who married in 2006, announced their split last September before finalising their divorce in January. The former couple share daughters Sunday Rose, 18, and Faith Margaret, 15.
The actress admitted that navigating the upheaval left her feeling exposed.
“There was a point where I was very fearful and deeply vulnerable,” Kidman said.
“Which is exposing. And then at the same time [I’m] going, ‘Well, I can either really not confront it and just curl up, or I can just go forward with an enormous amount of hope.’ ”
Kidman also credited her late mother, Janelle Ann Kidman, and other women who taught her to face life head-on.
“Nicole, you just got to take it on the chin,” she recalled being told.
And despite everything changing around her, Kidman says one thing remains firmly intact: “I know my character. I know my talent. I know who I am.”
Next up? A little movie magic. Kidman returns alongside Sandra Bullock in Practical Magic 2, hitting theaters September 10.
