Ask anyone in India to name the toughest exam in the country, and most of us will say UPSC. The Civil Services Examination is the doorway to the IAS, IPS, IFS, and other top central services in the nation. Every year, lakhs of people try to walk through it, and fewer than a thousand are recommended. It has three stages: the Prelims, the Mains, and the Interview, and one full cycle takes about a year.Every year, lakhs of aspirants sit down with dreams to write the most difficult exam in the country.But the numbers only tell half the story. For many aspirants, the real cost is time. They move to small rented rooms near coaching hubs, and life shrinks to books, notes, and test papers. One attempt becomes two, and two becomes three. Birthdays, weddings and festivals pass in the background. Friends get jobs, get married and buy homes, while the aspirant waits for one result.Many give their twenties to this one goal with a tiny glimmer of hope, but also with doubt, pressure, and a lot of silence.Recently, a Reddit thread on r/UPSC asked aspirants to share one thing they wish they had known at the start. The replies were practical, personal, and surprisingly emotional. Let’s look at what they said.
“One thing I wish I had known”: what UPSC aspirants say
Reddit user u/Disastrous-Annual766 started the thread on r/UPSC. In the post, they asked experienced aspirants, especially those who had faced multiple Prelims or Mains, for one golden rule, one habit, or one mistake to avoid, a practical piece of advice that would help them succeed. Many of the answers weren’t about books or test series at all. They were about time, family, and life.
Your urgency will quietly fade
According to one user in the thread, the biggest enemy is slow drift. Because each cycle lasts a year, your sense of urgency wears away bit by bit. The user wrote, “You will gradually lose your sense of urgency throughout this journey. Since each exam cycle spans an entire year, you will slowly deteriorate, inch by inch, until one day you realise that the exam is just around the corner and you haven’t accomplished nearly as much as you had hoped. Days turn into weeks, weeks into months, and months into years. That is the tragedy of this examination.Things will never get serious until you decide to take them seriously. More than knowledge, intelligence, writing skills or anything else, what this examination truly tests is your endurance, perseverance, consistency, and, above all, how long you can remain focused on a single goal without losing sight of it.It may take you years to realise this, and even when you do, putting it into practice is an entirely different challenge. In this examination, the truly gifted are those who are naturally disciplined.”
Prepare your parents as well
Another user said, “Preparing your parents is a major step in preparing for this exam which people often ignore.” Their advice was very practical. Explain how random the exam can be: some people qualify in their fifth attempt, already-selected candidates sometimes write it again, Mains checking is subjective, and luck plays a big role.Share your progress with your parents regularly continuing which the user wrote, “Tell them your progress daily or weekly what you did in detail so they also have the assuranceREQUEST THEM TO KEEP IT A SECRET ask them to say to relatives they are doing a distance course/masters instead of telling them about this examShow them videos of genuine toppers’ journeys and hardships, otherwise they will be influenced by seeing those “bina coaching” “6 months prep” narrative reelsShow them the question paper of pre and mains along with the syllabus so atleast they will have some respect in what you are trying to doWe often think this prep is just limited to facts, figures and books but trust me your environment matters a lot and your parents have 90% control over your environment (relatives, distractions, taunts, study room and setup) so thus make sure that they are aware of what you’re going through”.
Don’t put your life on pause
A user, who has had two attempts and one interview, shared a more reflective view. They wrote, “All of us pause our life as if life starts after we find our roll number on that pdf.” They added that after two or three serious attempts, it becomes hard to tell whether you truly want the goal or have simply put in too much to let go. Their advice was clear: “Have an identity outside of the exam and know when to walk away.”
